The Waiting Game

At some point over the last week, I reverted to age 7.  Each day when arriving home from work, I whip open the porch door praying to find a cardboard box waiting for me.  Sure enough, each day, when opening that door, I'm greeted with nothing.  Trudging inside, I sulk over to the calendar and X off another box.  The wait continues.

It's a scene that the old man in me feels is played out all too rarely across modern day America.  These days, what with Amazon Prime and "Federal Express", one can acquire virtually anything from across the globe and with enough money, can enjoy it's appearance on their doorstep in less than 24 hours.  This, however, is not the case with the American Civil War miniatures in 15mm.  

The funny part is, I'm not totally sure that I mind this.  

At the beginning of this venture I knew that I would need miniatures, and lots of them.  Due to the fact that I don't personally know anybody who is as yet involved with this particular field of nerd-dom, I figured I would initially have to coax opponents to the table by providing everything needed to play and would thus have need of two armies.  Easy enough.  

A quick Google search reveals that there is no shortage of models available to represent all manner of Civil War participants.  Generals, foot officers, surgeons, supply wagons, wounded, signal towers and even souvenir hunters are all available by a wealth of different companies.  So, after running the numbers and doing a fair job of convincing my wife that her husband wasn't finally going off the deep end, I took the plunge and invested in Stone Mountain Miniatures.  They have a great selection of miniatures with some great sculpts for the size.  For the noob like myself, they also have a section of 'brigade bags' that are light on the wallet and make it easy to have a good-sized force from the start.

However, the great price comes with a downside.  In order to keep costs down, Stone Mountain keeps a very small inventory and most of the orders are cast on receipt which means there's usually a two week wait and for a large order like mine, three weeks.  Although these days, three weeks can seem like forever to wait, it wasn't all that long ago that you had to wait (brace yourselves, kids) FOUR to SIX weeks for just about everything that wasn't from the Sears catalog.  For some reason, this really seems to fit my impression of historical miniatures gaming.  A sort of 19th century, gentler pace, you know?

So, only a few more days to wait.  I figure since I've put this off for 30 years, what's a little bit longer?  

That's not to say I haven't been productive!  About a year ago, I purchased a box of 25mm Civil War infantry on a whim so in the name of testing paint schemes I painted a few of those up and even managed to win a couple of eBay auctions  Look for details of this excitement in the next few days!

Until then, I'll be taking a couple of days off from work because I've decided that it's interfering with time that could be spent waiting for the mailman.  

                     

Review: Flesh and Iron

I know it's been awhile since I've updated anything on the blog.  Alas, it would appear that the HOLIDAYS and the circus that surrounds them have begun to get the best of me and my nerd-posting has suffered.  Although I may have not been updating the blog, I've still been keeping busy!  In honor of receipt of a big ol' Imperial Guard shipment from Games Workshop (which I will detail in the next day or two) I decided to get into the flavor of the army with one of GW's newer additions to the Black Library, "Flesh and Iron" by new kid on the block, Henry Zou.

I went into this book not expecting much more than the standard issue mud n' guts content that seems to be linked at the hip with the Imperial Guard these days.  In truth, that's kind of what I was looking for but I found myself being pleasantly surprised when it was all said and done.

In his second novel, Zou takes us to the jungle world of Solo-Baston where we find ourselves dropped into the midst of a local rebellion against the forces of mankind's mighty Imperium.  From there, the bulk of the plot follows the 88th Riverine, a Catachan-esque unit of amphibious assault troops and their mission to silence a shopping mall sized cannon that's dug into side of a mountain.  Previously held by the Imperium and seized by the rebels, the size of the cannon (several American football fields long) prevents the Imperial Guard from mounting any sizable frontal attack to take back control of the large island where it's located and thus, the Riverine are called upon sneak inland and do the dirty work. Carnage ensues.

The first thing that struck me was how realistic parts of this book seemed compared to others I've read that are along the same lines.  After I finished reading it, I wasn't surprised at all to find out that Zou actually served time in the military.  Anybody can write combat scenes, but where Zou's experience shines is the moments in between the fights.  The way the soldiers interact with each other, their emotions and mental state before and after combat and even how they clean their weapons are all little strokes that on their own don't amount to much, but taken together they really add another dimension to the novel.

One of the best ways I can describe "Flesh and Iron" is the Vietnam war with lasguns.  Monsoons, oppressive  heat and humidity, ambushes from a foe that blends right in to the indigenous population and the constant threats of the jungle all take their toll on the men of the 88th and by the end of the novel, it shows.  This all builds up to a pretty massive twist that even I didn't see coming, but makes it well-worth reading until the very end.

Overall, I really liked this book and flew through it in a couple of weeks' worth of lunch breaks.  Zou impressed me enough with this effort that I'm going to grab a copy of his first work, "Emperor's Mercy" as soon as I get the chance.  If you want a break from the usual "big battle" style of Imperial Guard writing, or even if you're a first-timer just breaking into the game, I highly recommend this book as a good one-off read in between the massive trilogies we're all so fond of.

Review: The Eisenhorn Omnibus

Aside from the compulsion to roll dice and maneuver vast miniature armies across three-dimensional battlefields, the one thing that continually draws me in to Warhammer 40k is the background material, or "fluff" as it's known in nerd-speak.  I've played games like Magic: the Gathering and Dungeons & Dragons for just about half of my existence on this planet and I have to say hands down, Games Workshop does it the best.  Say what you want about their over-priced miniatures, their (sometimes) broken rules systems and their seemingly mindless economic strategy; I think their science-fiction is top shelf.  

The man at the wheel of this literary juggernaut is Dan Abnett, who is responsible for many of the major works in Warhammer 40k canon.  I first started reading Abnett's work back in the early 2000's at the beginning of his Gaunt's Ghosts series, which has now grown to include thirteen novels with another in the works, plus a few spin-offs.  For me, these novels really set the standard for writing in the fictional universe of the far future and while I only made it four books into the series before I had to give up all hope of reading for pleasure in favor of textbooks and non-fiction, I have plans to finish what I started.

Which brings me to the Eisenhorn Omnibus.  When I decided to venture back into the grim, dark future the first thing on my mind was Gaunt's Ghosts.  I hopped on the internet and in the process of loading up my shopping cart, I found this little gem.  I guess little is an understatement...weighing in at a healthy 765 pages, this Omnibus collects all three novels in Abnett's Eisenhorn series and links them together with two short stories not found in the original printings.  I had heard good things about these novels from one of my partners-in-crime so I decided to put the Ghosts on the back burner and see what this was all about.

I really only have one word to sum this Omnibus up:  fantastic.

Honestly, I can't recommend this enough.  Following the exploits of Imperial Inquisitor Gregor Eisenhorn and his team, the series reads like something that would happen if television's Criminal Minds had a one night stand with Oliver Stone's Platoon.  The first book, Xenos, begins with an action-packed prologue that is BEGGING for cinematic treatment and this pace doesn't let up until the very last sentence in the third installment, Hereticus.  There's mystery, political intrigue, a dash of romance and a large serving of what everybody came to see, brutal violence.

By their nature, Imperial Inquisitors are a dark and shady lot.  Picture a man who is judge, jury and executioner roaming the galaxy on a private ship (armed to the teeth, naturally) rooting out evil in the name of humanity's Emperor.  Of course the lines between what's good and what's evil are often blurred as well as the methods of tackling these problems, but that's what makes for the best reading.  The other aspect of these books that really drew me in was the attention to detail of everyday Imperial life. 

In both the game and many of the novels, so much time is devoted to huge battles with thousands of men and aliens blasting the crap out of each other.  You won't find this in Eisenhorn.  Instead, Abnett paints a gritty picture of the life of the common human "amongst untold billions" in the 41st milennium.  The plot unfolds in locations like a dank, smoky mutant-only drinking hole, a psyker-slave auction in a corn field, a forgotten mining outpost on a lonely planet and even a world who's inhabitants enter a chemically induced sleep state for half the year because of the perpetual darkness.

As novels go, this one doesn't pull any punches.  It always feels like anything can and will happen as characters you've grown to like are killed off mercilessly, but for me, this only adds to the experience...not to mention you really hate the bad guys by the end.   

Whether you're a seasoned 40k vet or a rookie looking to get into the background, it matters not.  This omnibus is a great read and what's more important, a great value.  Dan Abnett has done it once again and this nerd will certainly be coming back for more.

Stripping Space Marines Pt. 1 (they're just doing it for tuition money)

Hello again!  It's been a busy week in grown-up world but I was still able to set some time aside to continue work on getting my Ultramarines up-to-speed and ready for the 40k table.  As a long-time player of both Space Marines and Imperial Guard I've always been enamored with big guns.  I could never quite see the appeal of speedy, assaulting armies like the Orks and Eldar.  Instead, I prefer to sit back and blast away, using close combat as a last ditch alternative to incineration.  For a Space Marine player, large-scale destruction like this can be helped along with the tried-and-true Devastators.

One of the main things I've noticed in my absence from the game is the prevalence of really gorgeous looking plastics that Games Workshop is now putting out.  "Back in my day," a plastic kit usually consisted of about 20 miniatures in identical poses with pre-set arms/weapons that slotted on and provided about as much variety as a box of black crayons.  These days, you can arm your models with all manner of guns/swords/bombs and put them in any pose your twisted brain can think of.  All for the low low price of your left arm and leg.

Now,  if I was my 15-year-old self again, I would have plunked down $40 of my hard earned pet-sitting cash in a minute and walked out with a fancy new box of models.  Sadly, 28-year-old Rob has a mortgage, gambling debts, bar tabs and a recent plumbing disaster (see also: the day our kitchen ceiling rained down upon us) to pay for and that leaves little room for plastic men.  I did however, have an old squad of perfectly usable, yet shoddily painted Devastators sitting in the basement.

Before...

As I said before, my main reason for getting back into the hobby was to test my meddle in competitive play.  Judging by the way painting has advanced over the last ten years, I'm pretty sure putting these down on the table would get me negative painting points as well as laughed out of the store by my pre-pubescent opponent.  You may also be saying right now, "But Rob, where's the fifth marine?"  Well, he went missing in the fog of war some time ago and was replaced with a more respectable looking missile launcher-toting companion (read: doesn't need a new paint job) who you'll see later.

I'd done a little bit of research into the art of stripping paint off of miniatures and all signs pointed to something which I already had under the kitchen sink.  I give you, Simple Green!

It works on cat vomit AND miniatures!

You can find this at any Home Depot, Lowe's, Wal-Mart, etc. for $8 and it's well worth it.  Make sure you get the concentrated variety though...none of that pansy diluted garbage.  The next part is easy....fill up a cup and drop them in.  I was able to fit all four marines comfortably in a beer pong regulation sized Solo cup.

Send that crappy paint job off to die!

Some reviews I read said this stuff takes as little as 20 minutes to start working, but after 20 minutes I'd noticed no difference and by then it was time for me to head out and work on the aforementioned bar tab so I decided to leave them overnight.  Acting on a tip, I'd tried this once as a lad with a coffee mug, acetone and some plastic Space Marines.  When I awoke from the fume-induced stupor, I was greeted with five grey blobs that resembled rocks with legs.  The great stuff about Simple Green is that it's non-toxic AND nice on plastics so you won't be melting anything.

Just about 12 hours later I pulled them from the cup and was greeted with this...you'll notice the paint is bubbling and lifting up nicely.

The agony!!!! Why???

Now the fun part, I used a firm bristle toothbrush (old of course) to scrub off the old paint.  Dipping the brush in Simple Green also seemed to help the process along.  It worked well but I think if I did this again I would get some smaller, wire bristle brushes that are used for stripping stain and paint off of larger household objects.  These can also be found on the cheap at your local mom & pop hardware mega-store.

After a few minutes of scrubbing, you can see that almost all of the paint has come off, leaving nothing but shiny, expensive metal!

A new lease on life (sans arm)

I used an X-Acto knife to get into the little nooks and crannies and remove the rest of the stuff that the brush couldn't get at.  Tedious? A bit, but still easier and more rewarding than forking my booze money over to The Man.  In the scrubbing process, his arm did pop off, but that was due to the glue being weakened by the Simple Green.  The plastic itself was unharmed and perfectly reusable. My plan however, was to do a replacement of all these little parts with extras from my Bits Box (or so I thought)...

The aftermath

Once I had finished with the scrubbing and calmed down my fiancée, I tossed the old limbs in the trash and set the minis out to dry before resuming work a couple of days later.  To my horror, I realized that I had over-estimated the contents of my Bits Box...I only had three usable left arms. THREE!!! DAMMIT!!!

So, with the help of my ever-loving lady (who I now owe big time), I dug through the garbage to find a little plastic left arm to re-use...I like to think the vomiting was worth it.

After!!!

There you have it...in Part II we'll get these chaps on the painting table and move one more step closer to putting this second chance army on the battlefield!

Switching Gears

As Paul had mentioned a few days ago, we are going to be attending GASPCon XI  next weekend at Pittsburgh's beautiful and historic Best Western in the Parkway Center Mall.  For me, this is going to be a landmark event as I've never attended a large-scale convention before so I'm not totally sure what to expect.  What I do know is that nobody can host a convention like Pittsburgh, who is famous for such annual gatherings as Anthrocon:

Furries!

And let's NOT forget the International Bridge Conference, an entertainment juggernaut in it's own right...

I think all those overturned water glasses speak for themselves.

It's safe to say that the bar has been set fairly high and I expect nothing but good things from my first convention experience.  In particular, I'm looking forward to the Classic Battletech 'Poker Run' event.  You can take a look at the rules here, but the basic jist of it is each person brings one 'Mech to the table, and you get playing cards by holding objectives and damaging enemy 'Mechs.  At the end of the fight, the person with the best poker hand wins the game.

I decided speed and firepower would be key and settled on a shiny new Marauder-3R to get the job done.  It has decent speed, packs a wallop with two PPC's and a low Battle Value means I'll be hitting almost everything I shoot at.

Everybody knows that a painted mini kills better and after spending entirely too much time on the Space Marine Sternguard Squad, I thought a 'Mech would be a nice change of pace...so let's get to it!

1.  I started out with a dark grey basecoat:

Stormy Grey

2.   To start bringing out detail, this was followed up by drybrushing a slightly lighter shade on top.  For those of you (like me) who don't have time to bother with mixing your own shades for this, Reaper Miniatures sells 'Triads' of three paints in varying shades.  For this 'Mech I used the Neutral Grays set.

Stormy Grey + Cloudy Grey

3.  At this point, I filled in details on the 'Mech like regimental colors, cockpit glass and gun metal.  After this was done, I lightly drybrushed on a third shade of grey.

Stormy + Cloudy + Misty Grey (seeing a pattern, here?)

4.  Now, at this point, most purists and professionals would start yammering on and on about applying washes, inks, more drybrushing, more inking, sandwich making and five more shades of grey.  Call me a cheater and heretic, but I don't have time or the patience for this for this.  Thus, I'm going to tip you off to a little gem I recently discovered called Quickshade by a company called The Army Painter.  In short, "Dipping" is a technique wherein one takes a miniature and literally dips it into a pot of watered down, inky paint-like...stuff.  With a little help from gravity, the ink then settles into the cracks and folds of the model and dries dark.  This creates a really neat shading effect that the pro's spend hours on. Suckas.

INTO THE DIP

So, I dipped the 'Mech into a pot of Quickshade "Dark" Tone and let him rest.  The important thing to remember about this stuff is at needs a good 12 hours at least to dry completely.

5.  Last but not least, I based him using a no-frills technique of green paint, Elmer's Glue and some Woodland Scenics flocking.  If you are interested in the Quickshade, one thing to remember is as well as being a sweet shortcut, it's also a varnish and dries shiny.  For this, the folks at The Army Painters have created an Anti-Shine spray.  You don't need much of this at all, just a few very quick passes over the front and sides of the mini and it's done!  Note: MAKE SURE THE QUICKSHADE IS COMPLETELY DRY BEFORE APPLYING THE ANTI-SHINE. If it's not, it'll turn everything white.

6.  Go to the convention and kick some ass!